WE’VE ALL HEARD ABOUT THE SPORTS CARS MIDDLE AGED MEN BUY IN THEIR MID-LIFE CRISIS, BUT WHAT DO QUARTER AGED WOMEN DO?!
Welcome to the existential tales of a quarter aged woman!
At the end of 2018 I put my pursuit of a job in the Australian film industry to rest. After spending endless hours emailing production companies, making connections, working for free, and getting in with the right people at clearly the wrong time or place. I. Was. Done. No matter how hard I worked to make my dream come true, for every step forward I made, I was thrown 10 steps back. But when I left that path behind, I struggled with feelings of failure, and then felt dread at what on Earth I was going to do with the rest of my life, and I spiralled from there.
A quarter life crisis is REAL!
No matter how much I joked and laughed about the idea with family and friends, it felt much more real to me than they ever knew. A few months after leaving the film industry I started a full time office job, then mid 2019 I ended a relationship. I began to question some of the friendships around me and it all came to a head in December of 2019 when I was basing my self-worth on the wrong things, comparing my path in life to others and judging other people’s decisions to the point where it affected me emotionally and mentally (and I didn’t even know these people!). It was an emotional low I’d never hit before.
Fast forward to now and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been! I’ve found happiness from within; I’ve become so comfortable being single; I have direction and purpose in life; I cultivated a healthy mindset; I developed self awareness; and I spent a lot of time alone (not to be confused with lonely!).
So with this evolution, I’ve really narrowed down what made the most difference in my life to the below actionable steps…
I STARTED AN ONLINE COURSE
I’ve spoken about the Yale course I completed for free online – The Science of Well-Being – many times before, and there’s a reason for that. It was the very start of my “awakening”. Throughout the course you’re given activities to trial each week which were tested and found to help cultivate a life of well-being. This was when I gave meditation another try and the practice finally stuck!
I LOOKED TO SPIRITUALITY FOR GUIDANCE
During my crisis I was given a handful of Gabby Bernstein books to read from my Mum, and it opened a new world and a new way of thinking that has brought me so much ease. Whether or not you believe in the spiritual world, there are some forward thinking ideas that just make sense. Check out one of my previous posts ‘Practical Life Lessons You Need Know From a Book About Spirituality‘.
I FOUND PURPOSE
This is easier said than done of course but I found more direction after I purchased The Life Map from MuchelleB. There were so many great prompts in the beginning to reflect on your life and build your future vision. Once I started writing out goals that I’d always wanted to achieve but never prioritised, this blog was born. Since I then I’ve started online group coaching courses and absorbed information from books, podcasts and free downloadables. I love to be creative and I love to write, and if this blog is also opening someone’s eyes to the possibilities of their life, then that’s one of the greatest purposes I could have in life.
I BECAME A SELF DEVELOPMENT QUEEN
I’m now a HUGE sucker for anything self development! I love learning about me, and I’ve come to this point in more ways than one. In keeping with my theme of ‘well-being’ for the year, I’ve explored my physical well-being with dietitian appointments (and hopefully I’ll see a naturopath soon as well); I’ve worked out where I want my life to go short term and long term (so I have an endgame in mind for direction); and I’ve found out more about myself through mindset work. I journal out feelings when it feels right, I take courses to understand myself more and unblock negative beliefs, and I know my body’s cues when I’m not feeling my best and how to make myself feel better.
I STARTED LIVING THE LIFE I WANTED TO LIVE
Once I worked out how I wanted to live and the person I wanted to be, I figured out what I needed to do in order to start living as that person. I wanted to be someone who woke up at the crack of dawn, who worked out in the morning (and many times a week), who meditated and made time for the important things, who created the happiest version of herself. What helped me the most to figure this out was writing out my ideal day and comparing it to how I lived at the time. Whatever I could see that was different to how I truly wanted to live, was a habit I began to form.
Though I may have left my existential crisis behind (thank goodness!), I’m always evolving. There’s still more for me to learn and despite recently being made redundant at work, I’m so excited for what the future holds and where I’ll be in another 9 months!
If you’re not convinced that a quarter life crisis is the real deal, then do go Google it. I’ll be here still trying to figure out what quarter aged women do or buy in an existential crisis! TTFN!
If you enjoyed this post, let me know! If you have any questions or thoughts feel free to contact me via email or join me on Instagram as I show more of the behind the scenes of how I’m striving for life success/happiness everyday. Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you’re notified of new posts as they go live each week.
I love you 3000!